


The Profit of Hard Work

by stifledlaughter



Category: Gilmore Girls
Genre: Character Study, Flashbacks, Gen, Motherhood, Single Parents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-10-04 00:31:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20462084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stifledlaughter/pseuds/stifledlaughter
Summary: Mama Kim worked hard to raise her young daughter without a father- after all, that's how she designed it. She sees young Lorelei with baby Rory and reflects on her path, and her Lane.(Flashback/introspective fic to back when Mrs. Kim wasn't Mrs. Kim, but a young woman with a plan to have a child and future- no man needed.)





	The Profit of Hard Work

**Author's Note:**

> Some background to this fic: Growing up, I had a childhood friend who was born from a one-night stand. The mother had been very open to the child about this, and how the father was informed but was told he didn't have to be involved, and the father was fine with that and never got involved. I asked my friend often if she really was okay with it, and she indeed always was. "I never knew him, and my mom did a great job of raising me. What's there to miss?" I had to agree - her mom was a powerhouse and wonderful.
> 
> I know this isn't the case for many people with absent fathers, but I based this fic off my conversations with this friend and how I see Mrs. Kim's attitude towards being a single mom and how I worked out why we never see Mr. Kim (as I have ignored the revival, haha).

Mrs. Kim had an hour before she was to pick up her daughter Lane from the after-school sports event practice. She dusted her shop, focusing specifically on the nooks and crannies behind closed cabinet doors. Customers always opened up the doors, and it would do no good to have dust billowing out to greet their faces when they did. 

As her dust cloth did its justice to a mahogany china cabinet, she mused on some changes in her daughter of late. Nothing untoward, thankfully, but an energy change. 

Lane had come home excitedly the week before, her pink backpack bouncing up and down as she sprinted through the doorway, nearly barreling down a customer who had been painstakingly counting out dollar bills. 

"Lane! Shoes!" called out Mrs. Kim, and Lane dutifully stripped them off before immediately turning to tremble in that way children do when they know they need to be patient but cannot tell their bodies to calm down. Mrs. Kim collected her cash, thanked the customer, and waited until the door was closed before turning to Lane. "What's going on?" 

"Mama, there's going to be a big sports event at school, and if you sign this form-" she quickly whipped a piece of paper out of her pocket, crumpled and slightly damp with sweat but amazingly still legible, "I can be on a team and get to do sports with other students, for one week! We have the big event on Friday, but we have to practice before then."

Mrs. Kim took the form and smoothed it out on the table. A standard form, likely a copy from the same one used for field trips with some minor changes. The students would meet after school for the next week practicing track, basketball, cheerleading, and a handful of other sports, culminating in a Saturday morning event where the students would compete with each other. 

"And this won't interfere with your homework?" Mrs. Kim asked, scanning the paper again. Two hours after school, snacks would be provided (although Mrs. Kim would send along her own with Lane, her child would not have Capri Suns and Cheetos like the others), and there would be teacher chaperones on staff. 

"No, Mama, I can do it. I promise." Her big brown eyes looked up at Mrs. Kim. "If you think about it, Mama, sports are good for your health. You always want me to be healthy."

"There isn't any football is there? Concussions are not good for your health," said Mrs. Kim, walking over to her desk to find a pen. 

"No, Mama," said Lane, her excitement thrumming out of her skin at this point as this tiny girl became a radiating atom of excitement. "All the sports are listed right there, no football, none at all."

Indeed, Mrs. Kim had read the list, but wanted to double-check if Lane had actually read it too. She had raised her girl to be smart. But it was always good to check. 

Mrs. Kim signed the form and handed it back to Lane, who folded it and put it back into her pocket. "Thank you, Mama! Can I go tell Rory you let me go?"

"Yes, but be back within half an hour to set the table for dinner!" said Mrs. Kim, having to raise her voice at the end as Lane sprinted away after "Yes" barely escaped her lips. 

She was a good girl. She just had so much energy, and Mrs. Kim was also learning how to work with that. Mothers, despite what she had been taught growing up, were not created the second their child arrived. She learned every day, and it felt like running to catch up with Lane sometimes. 

Before she knew it, she had dusted half of the main lobby's items, and it was time to go. 

The school's parking lot was full of parents lounging outside their cars, chatting idly as their children hugged each other goodbye and rushed to greet the adults. 

Mrs. Kim pulled into her spot and turned off the car, flipping through her miniature Bible to work in a few prayers. No harm in studying for the biggest test of your life. She read for a moment, and then rolled down the windows to catch the autumn breeze. 

It sounded far away at first, and then got louder, and louder, until Mrs. Kim looked up from her Psalms to see a Jeep pulling up next to her, the music blasting. The car turned off, and mercifully, so did the music, as Lorelei Gilmore stepped out of the car. 

"I thought that was you, Mrs. Kim!" called out Lorelei, who bent down to peer at Mrs. Kim through the open windows. "Don't suppose you've seen Rory with Lane yet?" She smiled, her young face still shining despite what she'd been through.

Mrs. Kim had mixed feelings on Lorelei Gilmore. She knew the girl's - _woman'_s_, _she correctly herself - history, and how she came to Stars Hollow. (It was just so hard to not think of her as a girl - a slip of a thing, barely 23, but on her own.) She herself had seen Lorelei, aged seventeen, holding a chubby-cheeked baby while balancing groceries on her hip at Doose's. By 20, Lorelei was an active participant in Stars Hollow town hall meetings, and held the record for successful attempts to speak over Taylor at said meetings. It was hard to miss the presence of Lorelei Gilmore. 

Mrs. Kim of course had her feelings on the matter of the child out of wedlock, but the more she actually saw Rory, she found little issue in the matter. Rory seemed happy, healthy, and surprisingly polite for the child of a woman who once suggested Taylor "stick his 'appropriate' skirt-length suggestions where the sun don't shine". Lane had become quite taken with the quiet, bookish girl, and Mrs. Kim had to admit that the increase of energy and excitement in school that she saw in Lane was somewhat tied to Rory's entrance into her life. 

Mrs. Kim recalled a time when she had run into someone giving Lorelei a hard time for "putting that baby through the awfulness being the child of a single mother". She'd been passing by the front of Weston's on her way to Doose's but caught the beginning of it all just in time. 

"Surely you can get back with the father - a child can't be raised alone," the old woman who had cornered Lorelei outside the cafe after seeing Lorelei with Rory strapped to her front with no ring on her finger. "You're only going to hurt her, my dear. Do what's right for your baby."

Lorelei smiled teethily in the way she did before she let loose to tear someone apart, but Mrs. Kim felt a fire burning within herself that she could not stomp out. 

This was injustice. 

"You've no right to tell her how to raise her child," snapped Mrs. Kim, turning from her path to face the old woman and Lorelei. Rory, unaware of the drama, cooed and batted at Lorelei's arm with her tiny hand. Lorelei gave her a loose lock of her hair to play with as her eyes widened in shock at Mrs. Kim's sudden defense. 

"There's no rule anywhere you need two people to raise a child. Show me where it's written! The girl is healthy and Lorelei works hard for her child. You go on now, and consider if you'd be able to do a tenth of what Lorelei does for her baby."

The old woman, surprised that she was questioned at all, said, "Oh my," and quickly scooted away. Lorelei looked at the departing figure, blinked, and then turned to Mrs. Kim. "Well that saves me a fight. I was about to go Mike Tyson on her."

Mrs. Kim didn't understand the reference but barely understood Lorelei most of the time anyhow, so she let it go. "You're doing fine, Lorelei. Just fine."

"Uh... thanks, Mrs. Kim," said Lorelei, still blinking with surprise. Rory cooed and yanked, hard, on the hair. "Ow! Rory! Gentle! I am not a bell!" 

Mrs. Kim bid Lorelei a good day and waved. Rory, slightly cognizant of what waves meant, did so to the best of her ability along with her mother. 

The sun did not glint off the dull silver ring on Mrs. Kim's finger. It'd been a while since she polished it. In fact, she didn't think she had polished it at all since she had gotten it back from being resized the day after Jae-hyun proposed to her - back when she was Min-a Choi. 

\---

She'd met Jae-hyun at the end of college. He'd been straightforward, businesslike, and together, they hashed out a deal. No romance, no love, no promises, none of that. She'd watched her friends search for "the right man" and seen them fall, stumble, as romance swept them off their feet and then dumped them into the garbage. 

She didn't quite understand it herself. She'd attempted to go on dates with men, waiting for those feelings to arise, but no one captivated her the way her friends whispered about. The racing thoughts of _him, _only _him_, the thrill of the chase, the small moments where a hand brushed against a pinky finger could spark a dizzying moment of passion...

_Frankly_, Min-a had mused, _it seems like a chore to be in love. _

She had much else to contend with. When she hat met Jae-hyun at a church event (obviously done behind her Buddhist mother's back), they had fallen into a comfortable familiarity with how often they volunteered. After several months of organizing church dinners together and a particularly successful bake sale, Min-a knew that she had a chance here for something that possibly worked for them both. While they cleaned up after morning services, she questioned him on his goals. 

She learned he wanted to climb to a comfortable spot in the business world in Korea, in a good workplace, where he could come home by seven, watch sports, sleep reasonably, get up, do it all again, and work his sports interests and friends into his spare time. But his parents pushed him - _marriage. Children. Don't you want a wife? Someone to cook, clean, and care for you?_

"But I don't, really," he said, shaking his head in frustration. "I'm not about that. Min-a, I don't know what to do. But it seems I am prescribed that, against my will."

Already an entrepreneur, Min-a recalls the flash of idea she had. 

"Let us make a business contract through marriage, then, you and I."

"Really?" Jae-hyun tilted his head. His simple, square glasses made his eyes look slightly larger than a normal pair of eyes, which increased the intensity in them. He drummed his fingers on the table in a steady rhythm. _Tap tap pause. Tap tap pause. Tap tap.... _"How would this look?"

Min-a wanted a child, but no fuss of a man. She'd been cautious of men after the tales her friends and mother had told her. Men strip you of your energy, your time, and asked for the most unreasonable of horrors. 

But - a business arrangement was different. 

"I see it this way. I plan to go to America. I did my degree in English and Western Art History and plan to use it. We marry, we have a child, you stay in Korea and send a small portion of your income to pay for the child. I provide the majority of it. You see her when she requests it, if she does, but I plan to raise her on my own and to stand independently. In exchange, you will tell everyone you are hard at work in Korea for your wife and daughter, while they live in the States, and you miss them dearly, but it is what it is. No fuss, no burden, and neither of us are bothered by the nonsense of actually having to be in a marriage."

"You don't want... all that romance that women keep asking me for?" Jae-hyun looked apprehensive. "A strong man to support them, woo them, bring them flowers, all of that?" 

Min-a scoffed. "What purpose does that serve?" No poem or bouquet of flowers would send her heart racing. She didn't need surprise kisses in the rain, despite what some of her friends had swooned over when she talked with them in her all-girl Christian tambourine band practice nights. 

Jae-hyun furrowed his brow as he scrubbed a particularly difficult crayon mark for where a child had gotten bored during sermon. "I'll think on it." 

Three months later, after more hours of volunteering together, Jae-hyun approached Min-a with a ring and a contract. "I agree."

They shook hands and discussed a timeline for the wedding. 

Her mother scolded her for not telling her about her suitor, but Min-a brushed it off as "I was waiting to see if he was a serious man." As Mina-a sorted through all of the work that went into the wedding, she dreamed of her future ahead. During the Buddhist wedding, Min-a thought of the church services in America she'd attend, perhaps even the groups she would organize. A business of her own, perhaps. The pitter-patter of small feet, a little voice piping up to ask her to read Psalms again, just one more time.

She smiled as people gave her well-wishes, nodding politely as they told her "You will have a wonderful future with Jae-hyun, what a good man. You have found a good man."

_A good business partner indeed,_ she thought as she entered the room where she would spend her wedding night. 

The necessary deeds were done. It was unpleasant and difficult, but so were many things that resulted in something beautiful. "_All hard work brings a profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty,_" she murmured to herself as she tried to drift off to sleep, Jae-hyun already out beside her. 

She had been working on the necessary documents and processes to live abroad for several months now before her wedding, and indeed, her hard work brought profit. She was granted a work visa based on her furniture restoration work and had found a sponsor through a museum restoration program in Hartford, Connecticut. 

On the plane, she looked out the window, and, strangely, felt like she was not alone. She felt... a stirring, not physical, but an awareness. _Perhaps?...._

When she landed, before even checking into her program-assigned housing, she rushed to a CVS, fumbled for the pregnancy test, and, in the dimly lit bathroom, wept. "_Tears of joy will stream down their faces, and I will lead them home with great care_," she said, softly, and she knew she would lead this child home. They'd find it together. 

\----

Mrs. Kim responded to Lorelei's question that no, she hadn't seen their children, but they'd surely be out soon. Lorelei nodded and said, "More time for me and my jams then," and headed back into her Jeep. 

Curious girl- _no, woman_, Mrs. Kim scolded herself. But not harmful, really. Rory seemed alright with just her mother. Rory seemed happy, healthy, and smart. Rory would make it. 

She was stirred from her thoughts by tapping on her window, and saw Lane's cheery face in the window. She had a smudge of dirt on her face and her hair was wild, but Mrs. Kim didn't see that against the glow of her daughter's smile. She rolled down the window, and Lane was still breathing hard for running over. 

"Mama! Can I go to Al's Pancake World with the rest of my team? Lindsay's mom is driving us."

"Is Lindsay's mother a good driver?" asked Mrs. Kim quickly. Who knew how other mothers drove. 

"Yes Mama!" said Lane, her brown eyes wide and sincere. 

Rory ran over, tugging on Lane's t-shirt sleeve. "My mom said I could go! Can you? Can she, Mrs. Kim?" 

Mrs. Kim briefly did not envy Lorelei's position, as arguing with not just her own daughter's big eyes was hard enough, and Rory's baby blue eyes were difficult to turn down. "Yes, but you must wear a seatbelt the whole time, and no talking to Lindsay's mother while she drives. You could distract her and crash."

"Thank you Mama!" said Lane, and hugged her mother through the window, as much as she could anyway. With that, they ran off, and Lorelei leaned out her window, smiling after them.

"They're good kids, aren't they?" she said, her music blasting out from her car. 

_It's because we're good mothers, _thought Mrs. Kim. _We did it. Ourselves._

**Author's Note:**

> The quotes in italics are Bible quotes, I feel like Mrs. Kim would be the type to reassure herself with Bible quotes and I was going for a serious/contemplative mood, but I admit, the entire time I wrote that I was thinking of that video of the guy called "Lady who has a Bible verse for every situation".


End file.
